Слова приветствия от Алисы

Posted on August 31, 2013 by Alisa

Здравствуйте, меня зовут Алиса. Я родилась в Англии, училась в Америке, а живу с 1990 года в России. Меня пригласил Дуглас, хозяин этого сайта, присоединиться с ним в попытке поделиться с заинтересованными людьми нашим опытом изучения Нового Послания и Шагов к Знанию: Книга внутреннего познания. В одном из шагов говорится о том, как мир пытается стать единым сообществом. Вот тут и наша с ним скромная попытка осуществить эту мечту.

Про себя: я нашла Новое Послание как бы случайно (хотя глубоко убеждена, что нет никаких случайностей в мире, а лишь закономерности) осенью 2012, когда испытывала некий духовный тупик. Я выпустила крик в эфир: «Покажите мне что-нибудь новое, сногсшибательное, которое я раньше не испытывала, о котором я не знала!» И скорее после этого, я наткнулась на тексты от Маршала Виана Саммерса и ошарашила.

Спешу добавить, что сколько я себя помню, я нахожусь на духовном пути. В общем, я считаю, что жизнь – это некая эволюция души, познание себя с помощью внутреннего поиска своих глубоких корней. Речь идет не о корнях в физическом мире родословной, а о духовных корнях, которые уходят в такое понятие, как Великое Сообщество. То есть, нечто больше, чем наша планета Земля.

Хочу подчеркнуть, что для меня слова «духовное» и «религиозное» отличаются. Я не считаю себя религиозном человеком, даже испытываю некоторую дискомфортность со словом «Бог». Но всегда верила в некую Высшую Силу или Вселенной Разум. А между тем, предлагаю Вашему вниманию текст “Новый Бог”.

Я тут пишу в основном на английском, но очень хочу доносить этого Послания до русской аудитории, хотя, к сожалению, очень мало до сих пор переведено на русский язык. Но это исправимо!

Так вот, я решила попробовать, помимо английского, выразиться и поделиться опытом на русском. Прошу заранее прошение за ошибки и возможные неясности в моих рассказах и надеюсь на ваше снисхождение.

Добро пожаловать! Я очень надеюсь, что тут вы найдете много интересного и познавательного.

* * *

Welcome to Mystery of Ascension! We are students and advocates of the the New Message from God. We are members of a worldwide community. We seek to assist the world in successfully navigating difficult times ahead. We seek to assist the world in successfully emerging into a greater community of intelligent life. You will also find some poetry. Find out more about us here. Contact us here.

Can I Follow Instructions? Can I Take What I Get?

Posted on August 30, 2013 by Douglas

This is the third post in a series of seven posts regarding Step 49 of Steps to Knowledge, where I am instructed to review my practice and experience of the first 48 steps. I am sharing what I wrote when I originally did this step, with additional commentary as needed.

Step 15 – I shall listen to my experience today – “I don’t remember doing this step very well, but I’m sure I did it. Listening without judgment is good fer what ails ya.” What I meant is that I didn’t have much of a memory of my doing this step. I consider “good fer what ails ya” to be the only correct spelling of this idiom.

Step 16 – Beyond my mind is Knowledge – “I did the Step, but I don’t remember hearing any deeper inclinations at the time.” Does this mean I failed at the Step? Not necessarily. The Step 49 review states:

“You will find as you proceed that some of your failures will lead to greater successes, and that some of what you thought of as successes may lead to failures. This will underscore your whole system of evaluation and will lead you to a greater recognition. This will make it possible for you to be compassionate towards yourself and towards others whom you now judge for their successes and their failures.”

I have a tiny bit of mountain climbing experience, and from this I know that some paths which seem easy at the time result in dead ends, and some paths which seem unnecessarily difficult at the time are actually the paths with the highest probability of success. Therefore, the ability to take what I get from following the directions is important.

Step 17 – Today I want to hear the truth – “The truth totally disrupted my ideals to be a hero, a hunger-ender, an apostle, a Jedi Knight.” I’ve only been told all my life by people that they have great expectations of me. They have quoted the Bible verse “From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked.” (Luke 12:48, New International Version). I have consistently disappointed both my expectations of myself, and other people’s expectations of me. I managed to simultaneously flunk out and get kicked out of theological seminary. I was ineffective at higher and higher levels of volunteering in the Hunger Project. The disappointment of ambition is an important milestone. Why am I telling anybody anything about anything? It’s what I do. I hope it helps.

Step 18 – Today I feel the truth arising within myself – “I did the Step, but I confess to be bewildered as to all the Steps that say ‘Feel this,’ ‘Feel that.’ The text [of Step 18] was helpful. I have to become the better person I want Knowledge to make me, in order to approach Knowledge. The whole Wizard of Oz thing. I remember thinking ‘Yeah, right, like I know my true goal in life.'” In the movie The Wizard of Oz, the Wizard gave a task to the Scarecrow, the Tin Woodsman and the Cowardly Lion which required them to bring forth the qualities they desired from the Wizard (intelligence, empathy, and courage, respectively).

Step 19 – Today I wish to see – “I did a hockey puck and a spoon, and I recall that I tried to imagine how the puck got its scratches, and that the light I saw reflected off the spoon was not the spoon. Just looking at something is loving that thing. Everything in nature (including me) will reveal its secrets to me if I look at it without trying to impose my thoughts and wishes on it.” I was improvising on the quote from American scientist George Washington Carver:

“Anything will give up its secrets if you love it enough. Not only have I found that when I talk to the little flower or to the little peanut they will give up their secrets, but I have found that when I silently commune with people they give up their secrets also – if you love them enough.”

Step 20 – I will not let doubt and confusion slow my practice – “I did a rock, and something else. It’s as if they knew that at this point, doubt and confusion might arise.”

Step 21 – Review – “I did the review, and followed the instructions to chill out.” Ok, ok, the instructions didn’t literally say to chill out, but they did say to avoid making conclusions and observe the line of development.

* * *

Random Thoughts on Steps

Posted on August 30, 2013 by Alisa

This post expands on my previous one about my Spiritual Family.

Interestingly enough, at my suggestion, my father recently turned to Steps to Knowledge: The Book of Inner Knowing. A sober alcoholic of 32 years, his previous experience had been with the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous and he sent me an email called “Random Thoughts on Steps” on July 23, 2013, almost exactly one month before he passed away, in which he made a few comparisons.

I would like to share a couple here since to me they resonate with topics I have addressed in my own posts here.

The first one goes back to my post called “What is God?”

My father wrote (the bold type is his): When the 12 Steps of A.A. talks about “a god of our understanding,” it is not the dogmatic separate “Gods” of however many religions plague the world, cause factions, wars, misunderstandings, and violent death.

Bill Wilson states on p.55 in the chapter called “We Agnostics” of the Big Book of A.A:

“——–deep down in every man, woman, and child, is the fundamental idea of God. It may be obscured by calamity, by pomp, by worship of other things, but in some form or another it is there. For faith in a Power greater than ourselves, and miraculous demonstrations of that power in human lives, are facts as old as man himself.

“We finally saw that faith in some kind of God was a part of our make-up, as much as the feeling we have for a friend. Sometimes we had to search fearlessly, but He was there. He(She) was as much a fact as we were. We found the Great Reality deep down within us. In the last analysis it is only there that He(She) may be found. It was so with us.”

My father goes on to address humility.

Bill Wilson defines Humility in Step 5 of “The 12 and 12” (The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous).

Humility – a word often misunderstood.

“ ………..it amounts to a clear recognition of what and who we really are, followed by a sincere attempt to become what we could be.”

“What a challenge,” says Dad.

I am reclaiming my father as a member of my Spiritual Family.

* * *

Who Is My Spiritual Family?

Posted on August 29, 2013 by Alisa

I am writing this post today because I want to share my recent experience and because the Step I have just completed speaks to this very experience.

Step 186 of Steps to Knowledge talks about my Spiritual Family and about reclaiming unto myself the individuals who belong to my Spiritual Family. The concept of Spiritual Family is first mentioned in Step 75, then in three more Steps (92, 111, and 116) prior to Step 186. However, it was not until I reached this Step (186) that my understanding of Spiritual Family opened in new bloom.

I would like to reiterate at this point that I am a beginning student and so permit myself the liberty of getting things wrong this time around. Therefore, I fully accept the fact that I may be wrong about my Spiritual Family. But my experience is this.

Who is my Spiritual Family?

My study of Step 186 coincided with the passing of my father on August 20. Now I have entertained the thought in the past that the members of my immediate family are people I have known before and so, potentially, are members of my Spiritual Family. And I understand this Step to be confirming this when it says that my relationship with the individuals I have reclaimed as my Spiritual Family is something I have cultivated thus far in my evolution up to this time and will be carried forward beyond my life in this world.

My father’s passing is my first experience of the death of a close family member and I was not expecting to feel what I felt. I felt and still feel the close presence of my father’s spirit, watching over and supporting me, even giving me advice. Paradoxically, this presence and counsel is stronger and more potent than I ever felt while my father was alive. I feel he is serving me and the rest of our Spiritual Family from this new dimension beyond the physical. This is an aspect of my Spiritual Family I have come to understand.

* * *

It’s Been A While Since I Thought About Step 8

Posted on August 28, 2013 by Douglas

This is the second posts in a series of seven posts describing my experience of Step 49 of Steps to Knowledge, where I am instructed to review my engagement with the first 48 Steps. I am writing what I wrote when I did the Step, sometime in January of 2011, with any additional commentary if needed.

Step 8 – Today I will be still – “I thought ‘You don’t need to tell me how to be still, buddy.’ So while I didn’t do the Step exactly as instructed, I did the Step” I notice my breathing becoming both slower and shallower as I enter stillness. I also notice a certain inner brightness, unrelated to the amount of light in the room.

Step 9 – In stillness all things can be known – “Being still is building a bridge for Knowledge to emerge in an unguarded moment.” An unguarded moment as in “a moment where I’m not guarding the idea that I am my body, or that I am my individuality.”

Why Am I Doing This, Anyway? – “‘a troubled dream,’ ‘a fever dream.’ I’m taking comfort that I’m not just waiting for the Reaper.” A Course in Miracles uses the phrase “dreams of fever” to describe what passes for reality for most people. It is my sincere hope that my study of Steps to Knowledge will be helpful to others, that it will help my life to be something better than a troubled dream.

Step 10 – What is Knowledge? – “Unlike my little self, Knowledge has no desire to be separate. I think I’m trying to approach Knowledge, but it says here Knowledge is my True Self. My True Self is calling my little self to ItSelf.” I’ve heard the little self called the ego, the concocted self, the secondary self, the constructed self, the imagined self, and so on.

Step 11 – I am not apart from life – “A recap of ACIM [A Course in Miracles]. The Separation is unreal, unhappy perception, does not exist. We consider perception as reality, but reality is far happier.” The perception which passes for reality is that we are not included in life, the reality is that I am not apart from life.

Step 12 – My individuality is to express life itself – “Just as the body is a communication tool, my individuality, my little self, is to express life. Thinking about expressing breast milk.” Let me explain. Nursing mothers occasionally express milk to be consumed at a time when they’re not available. In the same way, life is expressed through my individuality. Thinking of the body as a communication tool is one of the sections of Chapter 8 of the Text of A Course in Miracles.

Step 13 – I want to be separate to be unique – “The price of Separation is infinitely higher than the payoff of uniqueness, or what ACIM calls specialness.” Everyone is at a different station of separation or prodigality: some are headed for the far country, some are coming to their senses in the pig pen, some are on their way back to their father’s house.

Step 14 – Review “As far as I know, I did the Steps as given. I can so see myself in my mind’s eye moderating a group of people who are at various stages of Steps.” This hasn’t happened yet. I am not an early adopter by temperament, neither do I have a history of early adoption, but I believe I am an early adopter of Steps to Knowledge.

* * *

I May Need A Cup Of Coffee (Or Two) For This Step

Posted on August 27, 2013 by Douglas

Step 49 of Steps to Knowledge, like the other Steps evenly divisible by 7, is a review. But it is a review of the all of the Steps done so far. Steps 1 through 6 will therefore be reviewed three times, as they were reviewed in Step 7, Step 14, and Step 49. All the other steps will be reviewed twice, as they were reviewed in their own review step, and in Step 49.

This step contains the first instance of the word “Congratulations” in Steps to Knowledge. I don’t consider this a word of idle flattery. I say anyone who has arrived at this point has demonstrated some openness of mind and some resolve.

The current plan is to write a series of posts, sharing what I wrote when I did the Step 49 Review, seven posts at a time, and adding any additional comment if needed.

Step 1 – I am without Knowledge now – “Nothing particularly controversial, although I have no idea what they mean by ‘Ancient Home.’ Maybe the Mormons were right all along. As I have gone along, Knowledge has gotten bigger, greater, wiser.” The Mormons speak of a premortal existence, and their missionaries show a picture of a beautiful parklike place when they speak of it.

Step 2 – Knowledge is with me. Where am I? – “Where am I? ‘Flopping about on the surface of my mind, imagining that’s all there is.’ I want Knowledge to make me non-autistic, but Knowledge seems to have other plans.” I was diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome, a mild form of autism, in 2006.

Step 3 – What do I really know? – “I seem to recall thinking there were some things I knew at the time, but now I’m not so sure if I know anything.”

Step 4 – I want what I think I know – “I think I know that the world needs a hero, and that I want to be one.” On further review, maybe heroic ambitions are part of the problem.

Step 5 – I believe what I want to believe – “I recall thinking when I did this step ‘I believe what I want to believe in order to survive, reproduce, have power, have pleasure, and avoid responsibility.’ I am screwed, humanity is screwed, living in a world of delusion.”

Step 6 – I have a true foundation in the world – “Steps bounce back and forth between confessions of the current state of bewilderment, and the alternative good news. Telling me that I haven’t come to the world empty-handed was/is a great consolation, as I have been a problem for the past 30 years.” Ok, ok, that’s definitely overdramatizing things. I’ve had many happy moments, but I’ve also had many issues and disappointments. Some of them might have been because my unknown-at-the-time autistic tendencies, and some of them might have been because of prosaic poor choices.

Step 7 – Review – “Whatever I think Knowledge is, that ain’t it. Furthermore, what I think I know is part of the problem. I feel the way I think, I think the way I believe, and any correspondence between what I believe and what is so is purely coincidental.”

* * *

I’m Telling You This ‘Cause You’re One Of My Friends

Posted on August 26, 2013 by Douglas

Said Conrad Cornelius O’Donald O’Dell,
My very young friend who is learning to spell:
“The A is for Ape. And B is for Bear.
The C is for Camel. The H is for Hare
The M is for Mouse. And the R is for Rat.”
“I know all the twenty-six letters like that…
… Through to Z is for Zebra. I know them all well.”
Said Conrad Cornelius O’Donald O’Dell.
“So now I know everything anyone knows.
From beginning to end. From the start to the close.
Because Z is as far as the alphabet goes.”

Then he almost fell flat on his face on the floor
When I picked up the chalk and drew one letter more!
A letter he never had dreamed of before!
And I said, “You can stop, if you want, with the Z.
Because most people stop with the Z.
But not me!!!
In the places I go, there are things that I see
That I never could spell if I stopped with the Z.
I’m telling you this ‘cause you’re one of my friends.
My alphabet starts where your alphabet ends!”

I recalled this bit from the book On Beyond Zebra by Dr. Seuss, when I was thinking about similarities and differences between A Course in Miracles and Steps to Knowledge. I don’t claim that the “alphabet” of Steps to Knowledge starts where the alphabet of A Course in Miracles ends, as I have already asserted more than once that there is some overlap in the material. But it would be reasonable to say that A Course in Miracles and Steps to Knowledge emphasize different things.

In the 243 section titles of the 31 chapters of the Text of A Course in Miracles, the word Knowledge is used exactly twice. Once in the section “Perception versus Knowledge” in Chapter 3, and the other time in the section “From Perception to Knowledge” in Chapter 13. The word knowledge is not used in any of the lesson titles in Workbook for Students. In the same way, the word “miracle” is used exactly twice in the entire text of Steps to Knowledge. Once in the Step 28 review, and the other time in the Step 133 review.

I consider A Course in Miracles to be about learning how to correct one’s perceptions from teaching and fortifying separation and specialness, to serving reconciliation and redemption. These are practices that Steps to Knowledge requires of its students as they move toward the great mystery of their lives, their true selves which are not apart from life.

So perhaps it would be more descriptive to say that the alphabet of Steps to Knowledge starts somewhere in the alphabet of A Course in Miracles, and ends up in places that A Course in Miracles considers only in passing.

* * *

Bootstrapping Knowledge

Posted on August 23, 2013 by Douglas

Every computer uses an operating system, like Windows, or Unix, or Linux, or Mac OS. An operating system is important because it decides what computer resources (processor, memory, disk space) will be used by what program at what time. Who decides what resources the operating system gets? When the computer is turned on, a small program stored in read-only memory (memory that persists even when the computer is turned off), tells the computer to load the operating system from the hard drive into memory. Why is this small program put in read-only memory? So that it can’t be altered, like information on the hard drive. How does the computer know to go to that small program in read-only memory? The creator of the computer wired it up that way. Because the small program in read-only memory is much smaller than the entire operating system, this practice came to be known as “bootstrapping,” later shortened to “booting,” as in “pulling one’s self up by one’s bootstraps”

I was thinking about mentioning this when I wrote about Step 44 in Steps to Knowledge. There was a sentence which said “You seek your strength, and you use it to find your strength.” That seemed (and still seems) to be self-referential to me. It also seems a little self-referential at first glance that an operating system should load itself. But on closer examination, the loading takes place because the computer is following the instructions in read-only memory, which it only “knew” to do because its creator designed it that way.

There was another idea like this in Step 48, “True instruction is available to me.” The step said “You must love yourself to become a student of Knowledge and continually love yourself to proceed.” Step 18 said that if I came into the proximity of Knowledge, I would become more whole, more consistent, more honest, more devoted, more concentrated, more self-disciplined, more compassionate and more self-loving. It’s as if I had to find a tiny smidgen of Knowledge, or some of its qualities, within myself to start a virtuous cycle of approaching Knowledge, and obtaining the qualities which would allow me to approach further.

* * *

Songs May Evoke The Truth

Posted on August 23, 2013 by Alisa

This song “Ivushka” (The Weeping Willow) written in 1957 by outstanding Soviet composer Grigory Ponomarenko to the words by Russian poet Vassily Alferov and performed by National Russian Folk Singer Lyudmila Zykina touches my heart-strings and opens up the deeper mind where I can hear, feel, and see the Truth.

Зорька золотая светит над рекой,
Ивушка родная, сердце успокой.
Ивушка зелёная, над рекой склонённая,
Ты скажи, скажи не тая, где любовь моя.

Были с милым встречи у твоих ветвей,
Пел нам каждый вечер песни соловей,
Ивушка зелёная, над рекой склонённая,
Ты скажи, скажи не тая, где любовь моя.

Но ушёл любимый, не вернётся вновь,
С песней соловьиной кончилась любовь.
Ивушка зелёная, над рекой склонённая,
Ты скажи, скажи не тая, где любовь моя.
Ты скажи, скажи не тая, где любовь моя.

I did not find an English translation of this particular song, so I will provide my own. This is not a word for word translation, but my personal interpretation of the meaning.

In the golden light of the setting sun, a weeping willow dips its green boughs over the river, bringing peace to the hearts of those who seek.

Its leaves whisper secrets of love, of amorous couples who meet under its branches to hear the nightingale sing. Love comes and goes, but the green weeping willow forever bends low over the river, whispering its secrets.

The video that accompanies the song depicts the Russia I have come to love, and I dream of living in a simple log cabin by a river where the weeping willow bends its boughs and whispers its Truth.

* * *

I Wish To Know The Truth

Posted on August 21, 2013 by Alisa

I often ask to be shown the Truth, I often wish to know the Truth, in fact this is a permanent, constant desire of mine. But how can I really know?

Steps to Knowledge infers that I can refine the faculties of my mind to hear, feel, and see the Truth. And I must confess that I felt a certain amount of delight when I reached the following Steps; they spoke to something deep within.

Step 17. Today I Want To Hear The Truth tells me, “Developing the ability to hear and the desire to hear will yield to you that which you seek.”

Yes, I seek, and Yes, I want to hear the Truth, this is an ongoing need for me.

Step 18. Today I Feel The Truth Arising Within Myself develops the concept, saying, “It is something you must feel. To have a feeling orientation, your mind must be still. Truth is something you will feel with your entire body, with your entire being.”

Words I used to try and describe this feeling in the past are “I just feel it in the core of my being,” “I feel it in the marrow of my bones.” It has to be experienced, felt, and then you just know. That is how it is with me.

Step 19. Today I Wish To See poses a trickier task since it calls for looking at a physical object, but also says, “The desire to see, then, is the desire to see a greater truth. This requires a greater honesty and a greater openness of mind.”

I wish to know the truth

When I did this Step, I wrote in my notes:

Frankly, I have been having trouble with this step because it calls for looking at a physical object and I am wondering “okay, so what’s supposed to happen when I do?” Like it’s going to miraculously turn into something else before my eyes if I look at it long enough. Huh?

But I realized just now that this is not the point, the physical object is just a solid reference point for starting off. This Step is rather an exercise in impartiality, or flexibility, if you will. It’s not the physical object that is the key, but the way I look at it, my ability to look without preconceived notions or expectations. And then this extends to everything else in the world around me–situations, other people, my own self and the way I perceive things, allowing me to go beyond what “seems” to be on the surface, to some deeper truth within.

I feel that this Step is directing me toward learning how to see with my inner eye, beyond the physical as it seems to appear before me.

All of this brings me back to one fundamental axiom for me in life—if you feel a persistent tug, go with it, for there you may find the Truth. I felt a persistent tug to return to Russia after studying in Moscow for a semester in 1981. I felt this tug for nine years, until I returned.

And here I have found the environment where the Truth is slowly being revealed to me.

* * *

Mystery of Ascension

A great mystery / Is my true self that I bring / From my ancient home

Monthly Archives: August 2013

Слова приветствия от Алисы

Can I Follow Instructions? Can I Take What I Get?

Random Thoughts on Steps

Who Is My Spiritual Family?

Who is my Spiritual Family?

It’s Been A While Since I Thought About Step 8

I May Need A Cup Of Coffee (Or Two) For This Step

I’m Telling You This ‘Cause You’re One Of My Friends

Bootstrapping Knowledge

Songs May Evoke The Truth

I Wish To Know The Truth

I wish to know the truth